Movie Title: Spring Breakers
Director: Harmony Korine
Date Released: March 22nd, 2013
Date Seen: March 24th, 2013
Part 1 – Spoiler Free Quickie Review
There’s not really much to spoil – there’s just boobs. Lots, and lots, and lots, and lots of boobs.
I’m sure you want to know whose boobs you see. EVERYONE’S. Everyone’s boobs ever. Except Selena Gomez. You don’t see her boobs at all, I’m sorry. Of the four main characters, Selena Gomez is habitually the most clothed of all the girls. Even though they’re in bikinis for 90% of the movie, Gomez always had the least revealing swim suit. But, of the remaining girls, you get to see flashes of Ashley Benson’s butt, flashes of Vanessa Hudgen’s butt and boob (super quick, underwater), and you see all of Rachel Korine’s boobs. But don’t worry, beyond their boobs, you see SO MANY other boobs. White girls, black girls, latino girls, skinny girls, average girls, chubby girls, etc. There are so many boobs.
James Franco I thought did great in this role, he was slightly creepy (my sister was super creeped out by him), but hilarious. I don’t know if he was trying to actually be serious at times but he came off as just so dang hilarious that I was continually laughing my ass off at him. He played a drug kingpin, wannabe wrapper, etc. type guy. He had braids, a grill on his teeth, and some idiotic tattoo – including a face tattoo. The most memorable scene is one where he gives a mini blowjob to a silencer on a gun. Yeah, not kidding. It’s special.
The movie doesn’t have very much happen, it’s not realistic at all, and uses a lot of VERY annoying filming and editing techniques that just drive you nuts. They keep cutting back to past scenes that have nothing to do with what is going on – usually to just show you more boobs. They also use a lot of shots where someone is narrating over them doing stupid idiotic stuff, cutting in scenes of what is happening or about to happen. Once is alright, twice is ok, but when your whole movie uses those scenes, you get annoyed really quick. James Franco’s character also said the stupidest line about 1000x “Spring break….. spring break….. spring break forever!” in a creepy voice. It got old quick.
If you like boobs, go see this movie. Otherwise, skip.
Part 2 – In Depth Spoiler Ridden Review/Synopsis
Here’s a quick synopsis.
Girls want to go on spring break, can’t afford it.
The three wild girls go rob a diner while Selena Gomez goes to church.
All 4 go on spring break and party it up, do cocaine and drink a lot.
Girls get arrested, but bailed out by James Franco.
Selena Gomez doesn’t like James Franco and his friends so she goes home.
James Franco gives a gun a bj and says he loves the girls.
Girls and James Franco start robbing spring breakers.
One girl gets shot and goes home.
James Franco, Vanessa Hudgens, and Ashley Benson have a threesome in the pool.
The three of them go to kill the guy who shot their friend.
James Franco dies – the two girls kill everyone.
As you can clearly see from the synopsis, the majority of this movie is boobs. So if you like those, go ahead and watch it. If you’re a fan of James Franco, ok, you could see it too. Otherwise, no.