Movie Title: Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters
Director: Tommy Wirkola
Date Released: January 25th, 2013
Date Seen: January 27th, 2013
Part 1 – Spoiler Free Quickie Review
I went to see this movie because I love this type of movie. Crazy, ridiculous, over the top, lots of action, and hot people. Insane death scenes help a lot too. This movie has a lot of everything I like, with limited plot, so it was successful for me. There movie begins with the typical Hansel & Gretel story, then we see the siblings all grown up becoming witch hunters. The story then moves into the siblings trying to find these missing children from a small town. It’s a fairly predictable plot in what happens, and it’s even obvious at what is going on. They oddly mention things and so you think “why did they mention that at all… must be important.” But who cares. No one came to see this movie for the plot. If you did, well then, you clearly didn’t watch the trailer. We all came to see Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton kick some witch ass. They do it. A lot.
Some reviews have said this movie was “gory”. I didn’t think it was gory. The most gruesome death is a guy gets ripped apart by some vines and all his limbs pop off. But it’s literally a second long clip and doesn’t stay on it. So, idk, it wasn’t bad to me. There was no scene I thought “ew gross”. I do watch a ton of horror movies though, so I’m not one to judge. My dad on the other hand, who doesn’t like gore, also did not think it was gory. So I wouldn’t be worried about that. Some of the characters are annoying, but generally if they deserve to die, they will so don’t worry. I do think that Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton definitely didn’t have any chemistry going on. It was like you just took two actors and randomly placed them on the set together. But really only one scene had them interacting with each other (rather than dealing with witches) so it didn’t really matter.
We saw it in 3D and I liked it. It was well done 3D. I like the type of 3D that just tries to add to the effect of the movie rather than be a main focus. It makes some scenes cooler. They did do a couple of the stupid throw something at your faces bs, but all in all it gave the fight scenes a really nice depth that I think added to their coolness.
So all in all, decent for what it was. Don’t expect any more than a basic plot with a little bit of shirtless Jeremy Renner and a whole lot of witch killing and you’ll be good.
Part 2 – In Depth Spoiler Ridden Review/Synopsis
There’s a synopsis here.
I found it hilarious that my Dad’s biggest issue with this movie was the fact that “their weaponry did NOT fit into the time period.” Really Dad? That was the most unrealistic part you found about this whole movie?
I liked Edward. He was my sisters favorite character. I would have liked a little bit more on the trolls though… like had some bad trolls that didn’t have a conscience like Edward did, but ah well.
I wanted a few more witch killings, like maybe to actually WATCH their rise to becoming famous witch killers rather than seeing the articles about it. The movie was short enough they could have easily added all of that in.
It was good for what it was, I had a good time watching it, and I might watch it again if it was on tv or something.