Movie Title: The Collection
Date Released: November 30th, 2012
Date Seen: December 1st, 2012
Part 1 – Spoiler Free Quickie Review
Classic gore porn, kill-them-off one by one movie with attempts at a plot that fall flat. The plot follows the last one – we see flashes of what happened to Arkin (Josh Stewart), but with no real explanation of how long he was gone. We see flashes of Elena’s (Emma Fitzpatrick) relationship with her dad, but not more than “ok he’s a single dad…. and is rich”. We meet some other people that the Collector has “kept” but no explanation as to why he kept them or how long they’ve been there – and you really want to know more. Especially about one character, Abby (Erin Way). She was the most interesting character in my mind and I wish we would have found out more about her. Also, the main girl we are searching for, Elena, has a hearing aid. They show her putting it in once – and then occasionally in the hotel it’d squeak – but really had no point. Why didn’t the director actually make it a plot point or just throw it out completely, and spend time on maybe getting a plot.
The actors were hilarious. Josh Stewart, Emma Fitzpatrick, and Erin Way were all great. The others though… not so much. You never actually see the collectors face, just his completely terrifying shits and feet (sarcasm) – and him typing up his mask. He never really says anything and just grunts a couple of times. It was stupid.
There’s the normal “saw” type violence (since it comes from the writers of the later saw movies), but no where near as intricate as Saw traps. The grossest scene I actually think wasn’t a “trap” and just a gross re-breaking of an arm scene. There was a lot of stabbing and cutting. That was really the bulk of it. Yes, still buckets of fake blood, but it wasn’t horrible to watch. My squeamish best friend didn’t have to leave at all during the movie, so that’s good.
Part 2 – In Depth Spoiler Ridden Review
There’s no point in doing a synopsis, because there wasn’t one. The movie begins with Elena and her friends going to a secret club – and it being riddled with traps. Elena is the one who lets Arkin out of the box, he knows what is coming so pushes her down to avoid her getting hit – then everyone in the club gets killed either by these knives coming down from the ceiling or getting squished to death. Arkin escapes, and Elena gets taken. At the hospital, Arkin’s wife is there — and some flowers, that say “for the collection!” Arkin makes his wife go stay with her mom so she’ll be safe. Then a man comes and tells Arkin that he needs to take them to he was held by the collector – and help them get Elena out. Arkin doesn’t really protest… at all. I get yes, you think the collector wants you back, but there was no doubt in his mind it seemed that he’d go back.
So they find the place where he was kept, using the cuts that Arkin made on his arm when he was captured to indicate turns and distances (stupid). This leads them to the Hotel Argento (ha). It’s riddled with traps. The people start dying one by one in stupid traps. One guy just gets stabbed, one guy a hook through his face…. One girl I totally forgot what happened to her…. bleh. The traps were just stupid. More interesting were the people the Collector had kept in the hotel. Some people that he had made so crazy on drugs – and cut their tongues out that were kind of living like zombies in the basement. Then there was Abby – a girl that Elena finds in a nice kept room, but in a crate. Abby has makeup all over her face and room – and she says that they can’t leave – but does kind of follow Elena for a while. She points out some booby trapped rooms (like tripwires) – but once she sees that Elena has a hearing aid, she suddenly decides that she can’t help her anymore and screams for the collector.
All the people die, except Arkin and Elena, Arkin throws the collector down a trash shoot filled with gasoline and lights him on fire, and then Elena and Arkin escape. Their escape was idiotic because there was a huge fire in between them. Elena starts smashing these containers that hold the Collection in them (fucked up body parts sewn back together), and apparently, based on what the movie does, it’s water inside. Um no, if it was water those bodies would be decomposing like crazy. It’d have to be some type of embalming fluid – which is highly flammable. That wouldn’t make the fire go out – it’d only kill you faster. That bugged me.
There was also a couple of times that it was clear two different people worked on the script. Why? The characters were SUPER inconsistent. For example, at one point, Arkin tells this guy that they NEED to escape – screw Elena, they have to save their own skin. And then in literally the very next scene, Arkin gives that same guy shit for not going to rescue his friend. REALLY!? It was dumb.
Don’t pay to see this movie. Watch it when it’s on netflix, just as a background “oh ok that happened” type of movie. Crap gore, not even decent traps, and a horrible plot.